Cookies, Cookies, and Fortune Cookies

The Fortune Cookie is a thin, crisp cookie baked around a piece of paper with words of faux wisdom or vague prophecy, usually served with Chinese food as a dessert. The message inside may also include a list of lucky numbers (used by some as lottery numbers) and a Chinese phrase with translation. Despite the conventional wisdom, they were actually invented in California, not China. (wiki)

Just yesterday I had my first fortune cookie in years. Was hoping to get a really, really good prophecy. Instead, I got a boring words of wisdom (i.e. "The smart thing is to prepare for the unexpected.").

Yeek, I don't need that kind of thing. What I do need is some precise prophecy to give me some breathing room and hope for a better future. What I need... is this: